gweys

its so hard to stress on something right now, when all of a sudden, i feel that i am really lost in this blackhole; in this horrifying thing youve left me. but maybe this is bliss as well, not knowing where to go, after a sickening sound that came from somewhere here, inside my chest. or is it just my mind playing tricks on me again. too many shards of glass and blood adorned the floor. i dont know what to believe no more.

~G

gweys

i miss you and i need to be with you now, damn it!

..but hell youre away, doing some things, things you need to do without me..

theres a lot of things i want to tell you right now, things that make ne happy, stuff that makes me sad,  everything that makes my day and then destroy it all at once.. upon the realization of you not being here with me..

could you hold me now, please? i miss you like crazy.

gweys

some people have the capability to love extremely, without regrets, without hesitation. because they know that even at the end, even their lives face its deaths, their lives had been short but full. these people are able to touch and cradle the emotions that are deeply buried in the hearts of their loved ones. so deep that most had forgotten about it, had forgotten that they are indeed capable of feeling it. and giving back the same thing.

C and C.. IS love. or yeah, maybe a little bit of the obsession. but i love them anyways. do me a favor and read.

I'm going to ride this plane out of your life again.
I wish that I could stay but you argue.
More than this I wish you could've seen my face
In backseat staring out the window.

I'll do anything for you,
Kill anyone for you.

So leave yourself intact
'Cause I will be coming back.
In a phrase to cut these lips,
I love you.

The morning will come
In the press of every kiss
With your head upon my chest
Where I will annoy you
With every waking breath
Until you decide to wake up.

I've earned through hope and faith
The curves around your face
That I'm the one you'll hold forever.
If morning never comes for either one of us,
Then this I pray to you wherever.

gweys

friggin low, low blow. crossing the line. unexpected jab. jawbreaker. stab on the chest. deep cut on the temple. broken nose bridge. puncture wound. thrust on the stomach. cracked skull. spear through. pierced right through the heart.

that didnt come out right. i guess. somebodys hurting. and that somebody is _____. sheesh. _____ just didnt expect that.

friends dont just pop from nowhere and thats it, bam, youre friends. sure they pop on the place you least expect, but when you meet them there, something substantial is shared, that goes on living within the two of you, eventhough you have to part ways.

should that hurt ?! IT SHOULDNT. just like what _____ got from him, why get affected at all?

yeah, why should _____ be? hes right, you know?

gweys

This could have been her luckiest day. The feeling is overwhelming. It clutches her heart and asphyxiates her throat and picks on the threads of her sanity. The day should have been completed with the word “Hey...” uttered. But it hadn’t been. Of course it wouldn’t easily give up on the pathetic fight she was holding up for it. The mischievous feeling groped and wiggled its way through her veins, to her mind, to her heart. And it was successful on residing there. Even though that particular twine had already been tied. This could have been her luckiest day. No, it had been her luckiest day. Being with that feeling and that something special it reflected on its very eyes. Being with that most unconventional tandem yet living unaccounted for.

gweys

"...a flesh-eating virus.

you are so fake, so mean, and you live in your own little world.

you are (/have) nothing that i want." - odd girl out, excerpts.

so much like a "friend" that says s/he wants to be there for you through her/his ass and rips the good part of you and feeds on it.

gweys

although i arrived late for the gameshow deal or no deal last night, i was able to watch whats left of the latter part of it. and the player came down to having the 2million pesos and 50thousand pesos briefcases unopened. i believe she mentioned a verse from psalms, that basically stated that we should trust in the lord for He will give what our hearts desire. and she did. she wanted the 2million badly. to make things short, she didnt get the 2million grand prize. she went all the way, and finally got stuck with the 50grand against the offer of 999,999 from the banker.

funny. in my point of view, this isnt some noble thing. so why equate it with the selflessness described on the verse? the game is based on luck and greed. some misconception, i think. the player, although she spoke words form the bible, forgot greed belongs to the seven deadly sins.

sayang ang 999,999. piso na lang, milyonarya ka na.

if she didnt see it all the way through, hey, where can she find a person that would give her 999,999 in one taping?

thats why they call it a gamble. so, please leave all holiness behind. they just dont fit right. they dont fit together. they dont fit at all.

gweys

the word was invented a long, long time ago, when men fought with men, when nations were conquered by other nations, and (this may cause some people to raise their eyebrows) when people felt love for others.

true love binds two unique people. it never forces them to undergo change in their ideals, their goals, their dreams, nor their personalities. it only offers them to share those with the other person. and then comes the rough times of the relationship after some smooth-sailing. as two unique individuals, both would probably want to express their thoughts on the matter, but has to understand the concept of time sharing. so much like a queue, where the first on line gets to be served first. like when one shouts, the other listens.

now, lets ponder on: where compromise comes in. (please refer to the last line from the previous paragraph) its when exactly that is being played by the same person, in the relationship, over and over again. so, maybe theres not much to ponder here. only, too much love for the relationship, that the person being "manipulated" (i cant think of any lighter terms) is forced to give way, not once, nor twice, but most of the time. and for what? for them to still have the relationship they treasure the next morning they wake up. are they afraid to lose this relationship? i guess its a factor. but being afraid to be alone is not a factor.. the martyrs must say, its all for the love for that person and for the relationship.

its hard to compromise your own right to be heard. its like watching your pride get trashed by the ones you love. its not like people keep silent because they chose to, but they are silenced by the situation. it isnt easy to explain and be heard, but not understood. people then tend to release the burden by telling their most trusted circle of friends and be relieved for a while. thats where they get the strength to move on. the strength to keep the relationship alive.

so friend, you know who you are, like what i said before, all shall be well. but hear this one out: well doesnt guarantee you to be with you-know-who. who knows? all the compromising (and yes, love) might experience its end, its toll on your life.